The student news site of Los Altos High School in Los Altos, California

The Talon

The student news site of Los Altos High School in Los Altos, California

The Talon

The student news site of Los Altos High School in Los Altos, California

The Talon

Ellervate Your Game: My Torture Fetish

I’ve never been so happy to be tortured. From April till the last day of September, it felt like the whole Giants organization was taking turns strapping me to a wooden plank and water-boarding me. I thought it would get better. I even prayed. But I was foolish. Ever since October started the team has taken to pulling finger nails instead.

After seven dormant years, the Giants are finally back in the playoffs. It was a trying season. Even as a fan it was exasperating. From the horrific struggles of Tim Lincecum in August to the extinction of the one ‘Panda’ held captive at AT&T park, this year has been best described as “Giants baseball … torture!”

The outcome of the season came down to the very last game, and the playoffs have only raised my blood pressure. Against the Braves, the Giants enjoyed a narrow 1-0 win, a heartbreaking 5-4 extra innings loss, a 3-2 win that came down to 2 outs and 2 strikes, and another 3-2 win that got interesting at the end, (and by interesting I mean to say I hyperventilated). But the Giants escaped to see another game, and now face the Phillies for the title as NL Champion.

As a fan I have no control over the game, other than the Brooks Conrad voodoo doll I made, so the torture is only that much more. .. well, torturing. The only release I have when Brian Wilson walks the first two batters in the ninth is to laugh at Dodger fans or imitate a Bobby Cox ejection. I can’t help but scream in angst when Buster Posey, this season’s messiah, hits into a double play to ruin any chances at a win.

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But at the end of the game, all the times my dad had to use the defilibrator on me were worthwhile. A baseball team is representing the Bay Area in the playoffs, and with its young artillery of pitchers, its thong-wearing, superstitious players, and its caricature-headed manager, I wouldn’t hold anything against this team.

The number of bases loaded, two out, ninth inning jams we’ve been in have only made the season interesting. All the untimely errors were to test the resilience of our pitching staff. And every time we allowed Barry Zito to pitch was just to see who the true fans were (because only a true fan would endure watching Zito).

So torture us as they may, I’ll take it if they make it to the World Series. It really is the time of year when the impossible can happen. The Giants in the World Series? Why not!

So when it comes down to it, yeah, I like the torture. You might even say I have a bit of a torture fetish.

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